I was a kid in the mid-1970s, so my parents’ idea of “safety” might be a little suspect by today’s standards. I’m not sure if the seatbelts in our family’s Chevy Malibu were ever actually buckled and my brother and I played many a game of lawn darts, which involved throwing a large sharpened metal dart very high into the air with the hopes of landing it in a ring on the ground that was very close to where you teammate was standing/about to be impaled.
My parents weren’t delinquent or psychotic—like everyone else back then, they were too dumb to know any better.
Today, we do know better. Seatbelts are used, and lawn darts are banned. We are made aware of potential dangers out there and most of us take precautions to avoid them because no one wants to be the kid who can’t play soccer because there’s a metal spike sticking out of their foot.
Recently, society’s prevailing winds of “don’t get hurt, stupid” blew hard in the face of Florida-based TikTokers The Kelly Fam, who posted a video of their hack for allowing their 3-year-old “thrill-seeking boy” to get on the big rides at Disney theme parks.
In the video, the parents use flip flops and Gorilla Glue to create platform shoes that will allow their little daredevil to get onto rides that safety police at Disney deemed too dangerous.
The video garnered a ton of views along with heaps of outrage. Thousands of commenters called the Kelly Fam’s parenting skills into question, prompting a response from dad, 30-year-old Ty Kelly, who apologized.
Kelly said he was a “very much flawed individual” and also basically said that the hack was b.s. and that they didn’t actually use it. A longer version of the video posted on The Kelly Fam YouTube channel includes a disclaimer in the description: “This video is not intended to be taken seriously, as we made this video solely for entertainment purposes. DO NOT attempt this yourselves. Disney is GREAT at their jobs, and you will get caught.”
An even better disclaimer? “Don’t ever do anything people say they do on TikTok.” You’ll have a better chance of living longer if you stick to lawn darts.